Katie Bodager
It was a peaceful morning. My kids were at school, and I was cherishing some time alone. I vividly remember the gratitude I felt and the prayer I prayed that morning – thanking God for sustaining me through a difficult season.
Six hours later, I found myself disoriented and outstretched on the couch. Through a fluke series of events, I’d suffered a head injury. My vision was blurred. I couldn’t remember simple processes or form clear sentences. I asked my kids for a quiet moment, called my husband, and laid there in a state of disbelief.
A few weeks passed, and the doctors had done all they could do. They didn’t know when I would be well, and they weren’t sure that I’d ever regain my past cognitive abilities. I was on complete screen rest. No phone. No computer. No television. And most days required “brain rest” in a dark room.
As I sat on the couch alone one day, I felt so useless before the Lord. I cried out in desperation. “What am I supposed to do with myself now, God?”
Three words. That’s all I heard in response to my cry that day. But these words changed my life. With the sweet gentleness and clarity that only the Holy Spirit can offer, I heard this:
“You can worship.”
I thought I understood consecration. I’d walked with Jesus for nearly 15 years. Our family had experienced supernatural healing. I’d been baptized in the Holy Spirit. But this was different. I knew I was helpless.
While I don’t believe the accident was from God, my perfect heavenly Father used it to extend a beautiful invitation from His heart to mine.
Was I physically healed in an instant? No. But as I picked up my guitar that day, the Holy Spirit led me into a season of worship unlike I had ever known before. I was healed through many months of intimate fellowship with Jesus, and I came to know Him in a way that was far worth all the pain of the journey.
Sometimes an inner call to consecration leads to healing. Sometimes a desire for healing leads to a pursuit of further consecration. But one thing is certain. When we give ourselves to Jesus, He will lead us to a more abundant life. By his wounds we have been healed, and He will receive the reward of His suffering.
“He himself bore our sins in his body on the tree, that we might die to sin and live to righteousness. By his wounds you have been healed.” (1 Peter 2:24)
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